The Last Day of School

Today is the last day of school for our county. It is usually an extremely exciting, hectic day for teachers. A year ago, I was so excited to be done, as it was the start of my year of discretionary leave (I had decided to take a year off leading up to and following the birth of the twins). I was thrilled to be a Stay at Home Mommy (and I still am).

Still, today is actually a surprisingly difficult day for me. I am so thankful and in love with my new role, and I wouldn’t change it for the world. Yet there is still a part of me that feels like a teacher. I miss my friends and co-workers. I miss the camaraderie and the teamwork (although I have thankfully found new friendships thanks to being a MOM, this blog, and my writing on How Do You Do It? and The Wise Baby). I miss the students. I miss the success that I achieved as a teacher both within my school and in my county.

A lot has happened this year both for me and those around me. A lot has happened at school, and I haven’t been there. It’s a weird feeling to be so satisfied with my current life and yet long for the continued feeling of belonging of being a teacher. No, I’m not going back to teaching. I am happily going to be a SAHM to Audrey and David. I really do love this job. It’s just that today being the last day of school is difficult. I will miss that extra-long recess where I play with the kids. I will miss our last class meeting where I make them promise to invite me to their future weddings. I will miss the celebration song going over the loudspeaker when the last child has been picked up and the last bus departed. I will miss the celebratory pizza lunch for teachers and staff. I will miss the buzz in the air over summer.

I know, I know. I have a continual summer. I don’t know why today is a tough day. I really do have everything I want.

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